Book Review: Spare by Prince Harry

It's more than just Harry's oscillating penis.

There’s a lot to be said about Prince Harry’s blockbuster memoir, Spare. The unprecedented behind-the-scenes look at royal life, the stories behind the clickbait headlines, the unexpectedly prominent role of Harry’s penis, etc. But what stood out to me most was the earnestness that shone through his storytelling. Spare is the story of a boy who has waited his entire life to be heard and this book represents a new chapter in Harry’s life and the public image of the British monarchy, for better or for worse.

Overall, I enjoyed Spare. It’s filled with everything you could hope for from a celebrity memoir - juicy stories, unsavory confessions, and plenty of oversharing - but there’s a gravity to it that makes it feel special. Despite much of Harry’s recent narrative centering on his relationship with Meghan, this book is very much Harry’s story. His relationship with his family, his search for purpose, his deep longing for authenticity and connection take center stage. In a recent interview with Stephen Colbert, he emphasizes “why it’s so important that history has it right” and he clearly sees this book as his entry into the historical record.

While there are some bombshell revelations in the book (William attacking Harry, the frostbitten penis, etc.), most stories are ones we already know, but with context and perspective that we didn’t have before. Harry is specific to the point of feeling legally precise in what he remembers and what details he’s unsure about, as if getting ahead of each story being mercilessly fact checked. There’s an intimacy to the way he shares his feelings, particularly his yearning for his mother and the familial affection that died with her, but there’s also a pervasive feeling of restraint. Even in his liberating tell all, he’s clearly held back by the power of the Palace and presumed threats of defamation by their legal team. So, he’s factual and personal, which is all he can be.

My biggest takeaway from this book, though, is that Harry was always going to leave the Royal Family. His deep loathing of the media was always at odds with his family’s reciprocal relationship with the press and a breaking point had been on the horizon for many years before Meghan entered the picture. Relationships? Military service? Physical safety? All threatened again and again by the paparazzi. I think the threat spreading to Meghan and their children ultimately galvanized him to make the break, but he was never going to accept the scrutiny in silence like his family expected.

In general, I’m glad I read this book. I’ve been an amateur royal watcher and have followed Harry’s journey for many years, particularly since his wedding (which I did wake up at 5am to watch and which inspired me to dump my boyfriend immediately afterwards lol). I wanted to finally hear his side of the story. There’s something cathartic in reading his liberation from the “gilded cage” and there’s a palpable sense of buoyancy and relief that pervades the telling of his own story. But, ultimately, this is not a story of joy. It’s one of determination, self-reflection, privilege, helplessness, and escape. And, most of all, it’s a line in the sand. There’s no going back for Harry after this.